The Blame Game

Blame GameI just got this email today: “Please help me! i need to talk to someone im in a horrible condition and tried to suicide once. Please i need to talk to a psychologist as soon as possible. You may not hear of me anymore in like a week im definitely going to suicide if nobody helps.”

In my more than two decades of being a pastor, I have encountered a few cases like this where a person would think of committing suicide for various reasons that affect them heavily. These are all to be taken seriously when someone tells you they’re attempting to commit suicide. This email writer above was kind of threatening me, warning me, blaming me and telling me that it’s going to be my fault if he commits suicide if I didn’t respond to his email. Of course, I did respond because this was kind of serious. But let’s talk about blaming others.

Do You Blame Others?

Most people who practice this blame game (blaming others) are the types who easily gets offended. They don’t like it when things don’t go their way the way they want it or the way they have planned it. Their emotional immaturity is obvious to all but the person himself is oblivious to it. They have a hard time relating to other people. Whether at work, in school or in the church, they normally get into trouble with their fellow classmates, workmates or church mates. Relationships are easily ruined. It’s something that is a pattern for this kind of person but the person himself doesn’t know that he has this problem. This person doesn’t know that he has become an expert in “how to lose friends and antagonize people.”

How about us? Don’t we sometimes play this blame game too? The truth is, we can sometimes play that game too without our knowing it. Don’t we blame others too once in a while for the things that go wrong in our lives? “It’s his or her fault, not mine!” “You have made my life miserable so I’m going to make you miserable too!” That’s how we sometimes react. In this situation, nobody wins. Everyone gets hurt. Relationships are ruined. That’s not how it ought to be. Isn’t it about time we grow up out of it?

There is one accuser that I know of. He loves to blame others. He is the accuser of the brethren in the Bible. He accuses us and blames us before God. It’s Satan the devil (Revelation 12:9-10). He can influence our thinking without our knowing it. Let us guard our minds when we begin to blame others. Stop it! The more we blame others, the more miserable we become. It’s bad for our health—socially, physically, mentally and spiritually.

Blaming others is a sign of immaturity. Let’s all grow out of it. Let’s instead grow in the grace and in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ (2 Peter 3:18).